Sunday, March 12, 2006

Unconditional Lust

Act now and receive 50% off.

For the first time only, you can save on a limited supply of unconditional lust. This normally costs as much as three dinners, two movies, one day window shopping, three hours hiking, one stomachache from laughing too much, four days of kissing, 368 witty responses, one night dancing, and non-stop attention. Act now and save 50% with this coupon. In order to redeem this coupon, you must comment the following information back to qualify*.

-Do you like drama (why or why not)?
-How many women do you date at one time?
-How old do you act?
-How old do you look?
-How old are you (optional)?
-Do you own a U-Haul or have an account with them?
-Do you have any extra toasters at your house? If so, how many?
-What are your opinions on the lesbian community's term for "good looking"?
-Do you smoke, drink, do drugs?
-What do you think of Mullets?
-What was the last book, magazine, and news paper you read?
-If your answer to reading was "what?", What was the last TV show you watched?
-What is your favorite music genre?
-What were the last 5 MP3's you downloaded (If you don't know what MP3's are, think C3PO on Star Wars)?
-Do you play a musical instrument?
-If you could be a famous actor or actress, who would you want to be?
-Do you play sports
-If so, which one(s)?
-Do you play billiards, eight-ball, nine-ball, straight, or snooker?
-What was the longest time period between dating (another words, longest time single)?
-Do you work out?
-How many hair colors have you dyed your hair?
-Do you skate, snowboard, surf, wakeboard - dude?
-What vegetable do you dislike the most?
-How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

*You must be a lesbian over the physical age of 25 to qualify. Men are automatically disqualified. Bi and transgender female are encouraged to apply, but qualifications are at the discretion of management.

10 Comments:

At Sunday, March 12, 2006 6:56:00 PM, Blogger Esteban Corrales said...

some of the funniest stuff ive ever read. Hey check out my blog knockoutsportscom

 
At Sunday, March 12, 2006 7:07:00 PM, Blogger Ignacio JimĂ©nez Torrado said...

I saw your blog and i think it's cool. You should take a look at this website.

 
At Sunday, March 12, 2006 7:43:00 PM, Blogger Randy said...

I've been reading your blog for a while and I think it's very funny. What's even funnier are the people who seem to think your "personals" are real.

I don't have anything to sell and I've been lazy about posting to my blog so I don't want to refer you there. I just wanted to tell you to keep on bloging. Good stuff.

 
At Sunday, March 12, 2006 9:51:00 PM, Blogger ting ting said...

what? u mean these personals aren't real?!?

good stuff you got here.

 
At Monday, March 13, 2006 3:15:00 AM, Blogger Old Man Morri said...

you suck, as bad as your blog, join my cult and all can be forgiven. Maybe

 
At Monday, March 13, 2006 6:03:00 AM, Blogger Nishu said...

haha ...

 
At Tuesday, March 14, 2006 1:19:00 PM, Blogger Javier Marti said...

It is unfair that we, men, cannot enjoy your wittiness and warmth. And if on top of all that you are pretty, you must be incredibly attractive. (probably saying things like that is what disqualifies us? ;)
Enjoyed your blog again!
Kiss
Javier
http://niquel757.blogspot.com

 
At Tuesday, March 14, 2006 10:32:00 PM, Blogger Daddy said...

Wanted to play the Lust discopunt quiz, but alas I am a guy, and not too effeminate at that, great blog though

 
At Wednesday, March 15, 2006 9:30:00 AM, Blogger MichaelBains said...

If you need any "wholesale" lust, I've got tonnes I'm not using.

Gimme a call. We'll do lunch and then a deal.

clk clk ;) ;)

 
At Thursday, March 16, 2006 4:30:00 AM, Blogger morfel01 said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

 

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