Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Shrill Frigid Nag Seeks Unemployable Shemp w/Breath Like Hot Garbage

My ideal man takes me to the park to amuse ourselves by pretending to have Tourette Syndrome when kids or parents are within earshot. "SPERM BURPING WHORE!!!" He shaves a marriage proposal into his backhair. He promises to always "love me", even if he has no teeth and has to gum me. Will he gum me when I'm old and my hoo hoo smells like 1st & Beale at low tide?
He won't mind watching Temptation Island while sorting the packages we got from carjacking that UPS truck. He won't mind that doc sez my rash will clear up "real soon".

12 Comments:

At Thursday, April 20, 2006 10:08:00 AM, Blogger Jen said...

Ha, ha..funny stuff..great blog!!

Jen
Nubbit.com

 
At Thursday, April 20, 2006 2:06:00 PM, Blogger A Army Of (Cl)One said...

That perfect!. I think that guy will be out of Susanville State Prison in 15 to 35.

"my hoo hoo smells..." that was water out my nose funny.

 
At Thursday, April 20, 2006 5:20:00 PM, Blogger Kim said...

Not to be webstalkerish, but this blog made me laugh so hard, I may have peed my pants. A little. Thanks for the great read!

 
At Friday, April 21, 2006 3:56:00 PM, Blogger Speaka said...

ewww!

 
At Friday, April 21, 2006 9:38:00 PM, Blogger bodhi said...

LOL! thank you for the smile. i needed that!

 
At Tuesday, April 25, 2006 6:44:00 PM, Blogger Brady said...

I'm guessing your also a NASCAR fan.....is saying "Git Er Dun" considered pillow talk to you??

 
At Wednesday, April 26, 2006 5:02:00 AM, Blogger _Nashty_ said...

o0oh Temptation Island...miss that show..

 
At Saturday, April 29, 2006 6:15:00 PM, Blogger Varad Kalia said...

thats a nice written interesting blog you got there. Enjoyed reading. Read mine too

www.varadkalia.blogspot.com

 
At Saturday, April 29, 2006 7:22:00 PM, Blogger Jackass Jenn said...

I guess the thing that irritates me the most is if you're looking for him TOO, my competition just got harder. Damnit.

 
At Sunday, April 30, 2006 9:16:00 PM, Blogger g.w. said...

Fun Blog.

 
At Wednesday, May 03, 2006 10:16:00 AM, Blogger Wreckorama said...

Did we hear that you were a victim of the trainwrecks? Everything you ever wanted to know about the trainwreck bitches can be found here:
http://www.wreckorama.blogspot.com

 
At Thursday, September 21, 2006 12:44:00 PM, Blogger stella estrella said...

Hilarious! I'm glad I wasn't drinking anything when I read that. It would ahve ended up all over the computer.

 

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